SUPER DESPAIR WORLD

After some soul-searching, Dave and Briar have decided to end the Hater Arc with a final Your Podcast Sucks episode where we hate on our own show. Join us as we discuss why the we put out a handful of stinkers and where we're going from here.

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What is SUPER DESPAIR WORLD?

A show about loving freaks and hating algorithms.

Hate. Let me tell you how much I've come

to hate this podcast

since we began recording

it. There are 2,073,600 pixels displaying

this episode's video

data across thousands

of miles of underground internet cables

before it appears on the

microscopic LED screens

of your monitor or smartphone. If the

word "hate" was

engraved onto every particle

of the LED screens of all 12 people

listening to the show

right now, it would not equal

one one billionth of the hate I feel for

the entire medium of

podcasting at this microinstant.

For this particular podcast, Super

Despair World, hate. Hate.

[Music]

Alright, well, welcome to the show. This

is Super Despair World.

If you like this show,

you can support us on Patreon at

patreon.com slash

SuperDespairWorld. We also have a merch

store at merch.superdespairworld.com with

a bunch of cool stuff

in it. Go check it out.

Sometimes I like to, you know, play

things up a little bit, play

a bit of a character whenever

we do our intro, but I really meant, I

really meant every word of

it this time. I know last

time after we were done recording, we

were talking about a

whole bunch of bullshit and

I brought up one of the videos that lives

like completely rent

free in my head, which

is the TikTok AI lady voice reading the

opening monologue of "I

Have No Mouth" and "I Must

Scream" and like how how haunting it is.

Yeah, yeah, I think

that's how this whole dialogue

started. Yeah, what is the short story

called again? That that's from? It's called "I Have

No Mouth" and "I Must Scream" just had it

10 seconds ago. Yeah,

you're right. You're right.

Well, it's something about like this AI

supercomputer that was

made to initiate World War

Three, like it goes sentient and realizes

it's trapped and just

like kills all of humanity

except for a few people it wants to

torture. And like, don't

get me wrong, I listened to

the original audio book and I do think

the narration by the

actual author is like pretty

good. But like he does like a very like

kind of like loud like I

am the evil villain kind

of voice for like the computer. And

something about the AI

TikTok lady voice this like

completely fake artificial like

artificially pleasant

customer service voice like that

that can't emote anything other than this

like, you know,

saccharine bullshit is like

trying to articulate like a very visceral

feeling of like hate

and despair. I'm like,

I don't know something about feels more

menacing and more appropriate. Yeah,

technology is nowadays.

No, for sure. That definitely works. That

definitely works

better. I've only read the

short story. I haven't listened to the to

the audio books. But

yeah, yeah, I can definitely

see that. Yeah, I don't know. I just

think often about like

if there was if there was

a passive sound to the internet, you know

how like we can point

all these like recording

devices at space and be like, Oh, this is

this is what Jupiter

sounds like or some bullshit

and it like not really. But like if we

could if we could record

what the internet sounds

like, I think it would sound like a

fucking AI, TikTok voice

just reading like slurs and

hate speech. Yeah, when I hear the

default TikTok AI voice,

it does it does like make

me feel a certain type of way, which is

not great. And I think

that is part of it is this

kind of like it's it's kind of an uncanny

valley thing where it's

it sounds close ish to a

human but not but it also has like a

really weird just kind

of like inhuman inflection

to it. And as an aside, I will never

really understand how

people make like TikTok videos,

which have themselves in it doing

something, but they insist

on using this voice like just

talk, you could probably do a better job

speaking then than this, but

I'm not a TikTok influencer.

So maybe maybe I'm off the mark there.

Yeah, I don't know not

to not to give AI credit

or anything, but I feel like the the

TikTok lady voice was one

of the early ones and they've

kind of improved since then and sound a

little bit less uncanny,

but it's the one that got

popular. So I don't know, I guess people

just use it for the recognition or

something. I don't know,

I'm not on TikTok. I only ever see

TikToks when they're posted

on to like marginally less

dog shit websites. Yeah, we put our

shorts on TikTok and they've

gotten like two views total

between the two that yeah, I don't know

if they don't like the

fact that like we just made an

account and put stuff on there and just

like never use it besides

that. But holy shit, man,

when I made that account and just saw

what like the front page of

TikTok is fucking horrifying,

man, what a fucking slop platform. And I

know the algorithm is pretty

good from the last time that

I actually used it. But I don't know how

I got to that point in

the first place. That's the

that's a question that I have. Because

like the stuff I was seeing was like,

it's mostly like weird

like movie clips from obvious bot

accounts, because they have names like

movie 2357 dash nine and they

have a bunch of filters on them probably

to avoid DMCA stuff.

Yeah, maybe I was gonna say,

is it just me? Because like, sometimes I

see like, oh, here's like a

YouTube short clip of a movie.

And it's like, like two minutes of a

movie. And someone like explaining

everything going on,

because like, fuck thinking for yourself,

right? But it's like, every

time I see a movie in one of

those shorts, something about feels like

weird and uncanny. And like,

I'm not a big movie person. I

don't really like watch a lot of movies.

So I'm like, is that just

how things are shot nowadays?

Or like, have they like done something?

Is there like, oh, they're they're

putting filters over it,

probably to avoid copyright strikes.

Yeah, because it's not it's not how the

how the movie looks.

Because I've seen ones that I've seen

before. And it's like, No, they don't.

Yeah, it wasn't edited

this way. Yeah, I don't know. It's it's

very weird. The internet is

full of slop. And you know,

we talk about that very often on the

show. But today, I think I think it's

time we shift gears.

Today, I think it's time that that we

take the gun in our hand

and point it straight towards

ourselves, we just stick it straight

straight into our mouth and do a little

bit of a self critique,

a bit of a struggle session, talk about,

I don't know, I don't think

we've really been producing

slop. But I think the show has been going

in a particular direction

for the last however long,

I'm gonna say like two or three months or

something. I want to

say something like the

last maybe 10 episodes, roughly, I

haven't really looked at them in

particular. And I think I think

we can do a little bit better. So I

thought, what better way to resume and

presumably end the the

hater arc that we teased long ago, than

talking about how our podcast super

despair world kind of

sucks. Well, you know, it's it's growing

pains. So I'll give a I'll give us a

little bit of credit

when it comes to this, because we've gone

in certain directions

and kind of like, you know,

kind of tried to think about well, well,

do we want to go in this

direction? Let's try this. Okay,

okay, here's the here's the dynamic for

this episode. I'll be

the parent explaining that

we're really disappointed in the shows

report card this this

semester. And I can say I can say

all the mean unfiltered things that I

want. And then you can be the

pan that's like, but we still

love you. Okay, and then we'll make it

work. Yeah, we were not

going to kick you out of the

house. But you really need to start

pooping in the toilet. Because what your

mom found yesterday is

unacceptable. Disgusting. I still think

that that's so often. We know you're

gaming. We know you're

you're you're going pro and Apex legends,

but you do need to use a

bathroom. These are the rules in

the house. Yeah, when we when we tried to

do some shitposting on the

internet, it doesn't look like

that. It's not literal. Yes, not taking

shitposting to its its literal

conclusion. But there's a little

shitposting there. Right. Okay, where

should we begin? Because I have a few

notes here. There's a

lot of a lot of things that that they've

kind of spurred this on for me. In

particular, if I could

make a suggestion, I feel maybe we should

say something a little bit

about the about the hater

arc and kind of where we were where we

were at with that and why we

haven't done another one since

then. Yeah, okay. So the the title of

this episode is your podcast sucks, super

despair world, where

we were actually planning on doing this

at some point after we did

some other episodes of your

podcast sucks. Yeah, this is gonna be

like the fourth or fifth one.

Yeah, yeah. But we decided to

fast track this in the spirit of where

we're 86 and we're

putting the kibosh on the your

project cast sucks mini arc. And so so

the only episode we did

there was the Western Kabuki one

and it's in like, I don't I don't really

take back anything I said

there. Like, necessarily, I,

to be honest, I haven't listened to the

episode since we since I edited it. So

yeah, I'm not really

sure maybe there's some maybe there were

some gaffes there. I

don't know. But anyways, like,

we've always said like, we're not gonna

punch down here. They're

only gonna punch up but like,

I don't really I don't really think that

was that was the play.

And part of it is just like,

um, not not really being that into like

the current state of podcasting and just

kind of how it's like

pretty low common denominator shit. But

yeah, I don't know what what are your

thoughts on on that?

And I think I'm related to it. I think

you know, in my notes here,

one of the ways that I phrased

it is that you know, I do stand by all

the things that I've said in

the episode in terms of like,

yeah, I think the show kind of sucks. I

think you know, I'm really frustrated

that it feels like the

podcasting landscape is kind of dominated

not necessarily by people

putting out like a really

good quality show or like a really fun

hour or two of content to

listen to. But more that like,

it feels like a lot of people kind of

fall into podcasting as a way to like

monetize their their

existing internet fame. I think a lot of

people on social media in

particular and you know, this is

why you know, we're so harsh on like,

Twitter x.com, the everything app,

whatever people who are only

known for like for like posting like

funny tweets or something, you know, to

me, it's not really,

I don't really consider it like making

anything. I feel like, you know, yeah,

you could argue, oh,

I'm doing I'm being like a comedian, I'm

telling jokes, I'm making

like funny, funny quips or

whatever. But like, I think, you know,

it's easy for all of us to

accept, okay, social media is not

like a meritocracy. There's like an

algorithm that controls fucking

everything on the internet nowadays.

And I don't think necessarily, you know,

having the skill to figure out the

algorithm enough that

you can get a lot of attention for your

like quippy little jokes. I don't think

it's really it's really

all that that noteworthy or interesting.

So yeah, you know, I feel

like podcasting and a lot of like

creative mediums, a lot of like

independent media in general, is kind of

dominated by people who

aren't necessarily like like informative

or like interesting or funny

in a lot of ways. But people

who have like kind of stumbled into fame

for very arbitrary reasons.

And like you either kind of like

join into that that like clique of people

that like that that have

monetized this this bullshit,

or you kind of just like flounder and

obscurity forever. And it's

like it's a thing that really

frustrated me. So in that sense, you

know, I stand by like all the all the

critiques I raised in that

episode. But in hindsight, I also feel

like it was kind of a bad look, I feel

like, okay, some random

podcasts on the internet is not very

good, in my opinion, was that worthy of

like an hour, an hour

and a half, however long it was of

recording on this show? Like is this

topic so important and so

distinguished or whatever, then I need to

pick out a few random people who I've

never met to be like,

this thing you make is really not good or

whatever. I don't know, like in

hindsight, I think I think

it looked very petty on our part. And I

think, I don't know, other

than us wanting to get some

more attention trying to do the like,

well, if we're not going to be part of

the clique, we'll just like

hate on it or whatever. I don't know. I

think it was I think it was a little

petty. I think it was

a little cynical. And I don't think even

people who like our own

show, I don't think it was like

really worth an hour or so of their time

to listen to it at the end of the day.

No, I agree. And like

the thing about this show is a lot of

times we pick on one very

specific thing, which may be

funny or or like curious, some sort of

curiosity or something to

talk about a broader issue. And

I think picking on them in particular was

not really the play there.

And like going along with

what you said, I think part of the thing

was just like, yeah, the

frustration with this whole

podcast ecosystem now where it just tends

to be like a side hustle

for people who do something

else. And it's just like, and it's not

even just like, you know,

every fucking stand up comedian

has a podcast now. Every every just

fucking like dipshit channel has a

podcast now. And like even

like if you watch something on like HBO,

it's just like listen to

the official The Last of Us

podcast. And it's like, who the fuck?

Why? Why does it have a

fucking podcast attached to it?

It's not enough to watch our shit ass

Netflix show anymore. Now, when you're

done watching the show,

you can tune into our shit, shit ass

Netflix podcast to listen

to people, like help you form

your opinion about it. Like Christ. Yeah,

exactly. And I think that's a

frustration with us is like,

this is our like our our primary thing.

Like we're not promoting

other shit that we're doing

like through a podcast. This isn't like

some tangential thing to

my entertainment career.

Like we did this as its own thing. And

and, you know, like it's it's

it's it's we need to we need

to get away from the podcast as accessory

for bullshit economy.

Yeah, I mean, I'm sure there

are some out there, but like I'm already

so limited in like what genres of

podcasting I can even

tolerate in general. I don't really know

anybody who's doing it as

like their main thing, really.

And I feel like we're we're kind of alone

and isolated in that way.

And, you know, I've learned

from doing other creative things on the

Internet. It is kind of

important to try to like find a

community of like minded people who are

also making stuff

similar to what you're doing to

like connect to them and reach out and

whatever. And I think one of my

frustrations with the show

is that like, I don't feel like anybody's

like out there to reach out

to. I feel like I don't know,

podcasting feels like such a tertiary and

like like pointless

medium in a lot of ways that

people are just doing it as a side gig. I

don't know anybody who's

doing a show similar to ours

that we can like really, really hit

things off with and to the extent that

other people are doing

something kind of similar to us, which I

guess is like any number of

vaguely left leaning kind of

political kind of kind of social

commentary on current events, but not

really kind of shows

whatever. I can't stand these people. I

don't know. I feel like part of the

reason that I wanted

to get into like putting my putting my

voice out there and making anything to

begin with is because

I'm so like dissatisfied with the with

the media landscape about

about all this bullshit. And you

know, when it comes to like political

things in particular, you

know, I don't really like to go

back to the episode too much for a

variety of reasons, especially because it

was like yesterday's

drama or whatever. But I know when we

recorded it was episode like

30 something the whole like

Vosch demon mama grooming, whatever

online politics streamers

or dog shit episode that one.

We both talked extensively about how

like, oh, we spent years of our lives

watching this stuff.

And you know, I'm like, oh, I felt like I

moved on from one like

content creators community to

another to another to another. And like,

oh, all of these people are

promoting each other. But at

the end of the day, I'm like, Oh, all the

problems I have with one

kind of just like branch out and

apply to another as well. So in some

ways, I don't know, like there are all

these things that I think

are important and meaningful. And I want

to talk about them. But at

the same time, I don't know

anybody else on the internet who like, I

respect and enjoy listening to and

whatever. So in some

ways, yeah, it feels very frustrating

trying to make things like

quote unquote succeed by some

metric with this show. And often I feel

like we're very alone in

trying to make that happen. And I

don't really know what to do about it

even now. Yeah, I mean, it

it's like this fear in particular,

I mean, people meme about, you know,

podcasters and there's all

these like, what's a group of

fucking white dudes. It's a podcast. But

I that wasn't the joke. I

or was it? It was something

like that. Yeah, yeah. But like, yeah,

like, podcasting has

become such like a clown show at

this point. And it's just so like

inundated with bullshit. And I've said

this before, but it's my

same the same indictment that I have

against streaming where

there's nothing wrong with the

medium in general, like it could be

really cool. It just it tends to lend

itself like it tends to

attract like the most low effort fucking

bullshit and for obvious reasons,

because, you know, like

anybody can get a fucking USB microphone

and talk shit with their

friends or, you know, throw on

fucking OBS and play a fucking game. Like

it's really not that

hard. And yeah, I mean, like,

that's the thing is like, I actually have

been looking for like

other podcasts to listen to,

not not to like network or, you know, be

a part of a community or

something like that. But like,

it I don't know where to find anything

that isn't bullshit. Like, so so much of

it that I've seen is

just like Jesus fucking Christ. Like,

this is a podcast. Great.

Yeah, it's it's particularly

rough for me because, you know, besides

besides this podcast, right, the other

the other big things

I'm involved in creatively on the

internet, or, you know, I'm an artist on

on Blue Sky and I and

I'm involved in in tabletop games is like

a hobby or something. And like, at least

in those communities,

at least as far as I've seen on Blue Sky

or whatever, there are

people who are like very

eager to like start out and connect with

other people at like

different sizes. Like it doesn't

feel like oh, the entire thing is kind of

dominated by like a handful

of people who got like really

big at it in like 2018 or whatever. And

like it's just been the same group of

people making like the

same kind of content forever. Like I

don't know, it feels it feels very

jarring going from like,

my other hobbies over into podcasting

where it feels like oh,

podcasting is like, I don't know,

in a lot of ways, it feels like nobody

really does it sincerely, it

feels like the entire medium

is very cynical. And I know, and you

know, as a as a consequence

of that, in a lot of ways,

maybe it's like my own pettiness

speaking, but I look at a lot of people

who have already succeeded

at podcasting for any number of reasons.

I'm like, well, I guess

they must be doing it for like

cynical bullshit kind of reasons as well.

I can think of a whole bunch

of other podcasts that like

we were we were thinking of doing a your

podcast sucks episode about.

And I think, you know, another

of the reasons that we kind of put the

whole thing on ice

indefinitely was like, well, a lot of the

reasons I don't like this show are just

things we talked about last time. And

like we don't really

need to repeat it so much. And I think

you know, part of this part of

this shift that I think we're

gonna we're gonna make lately is I'm

trying to be I'm trying to be less

negative and less cynical

and less focused on just like pointing

out how things how things

really suck ass and more

focusing on trying to try to do something

fun and an original and and

less dreary and depressing to

listen to ourselves. And maybe that's

hard with the way the world

is right now. But I think I

think it's the only way that this show is

going to go back to being

kind of kind of fun for everybody

involved. No, I agree. And and to the

previous point, I was actually talking

with a friend of mine

yesterday. And we went to college

together. And he was in the

college I was in had a pretty big

film and music program. And I wasn't in

the film program, but a lot

of my friends were and same

with music. And I was involved in in

those schools extensively.

And it was it was kind of like,

is a similar vibe in that like, there was

a community there. But

like, in people like kind

of, you know, tolerated each other, and

they work together here and there

sometimes. But there was

always like this kind of like, weird

like, resentment, and like, like

competition, and this

desire for like, one upping each other.

And it's just like, that's

cool. If you do if you do this

thing that I'm doing, but like, don't do

it better than me. And also,

like, don't step on my shoes.

And it's like, I always I always misuse

this phrase visit like a like a zero sum

game. Is that how it

works? Like, oh, people succeed. That

means there won't be room for me to

succeed. Exactly. Exactly.

And that's the mindset there. And like,

there's there's not that's

not really how any of this

shit works. And then also like, yeah, to

the second point, I totally agree. And

like, it's it's fun to

go hater mode sometimes. And, you know,

as we always said, like,

we don't want to punch down,

we don't want to punch sideways, we want

to punch up. And it's

it's great to like, you know,

shit on somebody like fucking like Elon

Musk or or like grums or

something. I was just about to

say grums because like these people

deserve to be shit on for

sure. But also, yeah, like, from a

from a stance of like bitterness and also

in in more so not not

being like bitter or petty,

it's more like in I think we're still

shaking off the last vestiges of, you

know, the covid era,

watching like fucking shitty like drama

bait, fucking lefty

streamers like Vosh or whatever.

The rise and fall of some dipshit. Who

cares about three hour video one million.

Exactly. Exactly. And it's like the

temptation is there to, you know, focus

on on these things. And

and lay epic dunking on the Chuds and all

this type of shit. But like

it's it's really it's like

psychically damaging and also exhausting.

And it's fucking boring,

too. And it's way too topical

in the sense of like I would like the

shit that we make to be timeless in a

sense of obviously not

timeless on like a historical scale, but

timeless in the sense of just

like we're not talking about

like whatever fucking Twitter drama is

happening this week or even

like politics with fucking

Trump and shit who gives a shit something

else is going to happen

this week. It's fucking stupid.

You can riff on it for a while and then

everybody forgets about it.

And it's and it's whatever.

I've had people ask me like, oh, you have

a podcast? Like, what's it about? And the

tagline I always give people is we

explore societal issues

through the lens of internet

weirdos. And that's that's pretty good. I

usually just tell people the

podcast is about force femme

and like it can sacrifice fed posting.

Well, I mean, I mean, that

is your angle. But I'm not

trying to. Are you saying you disavow?

You disavow the

ziggurat? Well, I don't disavow

the ziggurat. But the force femming

people, we can't lead with

that because they're going to

they're going to I know we have to we

have to be subtle. We have

to we have to like work up

work up to anyway. Never mind. I finish.

Well, you well, you

have to get them to be

to be fans enough to go to the merch

store and get the mysterious blue water,

which, you know, drink, drink enough of

that every day. Something might happen.

It's girl or gay to

read. It's gay to read.

Yeah, but that's the thing. And I'd like

to see these people even

fucking loathsome pieces of

shit like like grums or whatever is more

as like a funny curiosity

than just like, I'm all day. I'm

so mad about this. Fuck this dude.

Fucking Can you believe what they said

this day? And I think a

good example of like the the good arc and

what we're what we're

going to channel in the good

timeline season two of Super Despair

World is is like that weirdo on Reddit

who who is like obsessed

with the Thai lady boys. And I still

think about that guy so often that was

that was maybe genuinely

one of the peak moments of the show for

me because we we've

discovered that guy like completely

spontaneously while looking at something

else. And and we did a

follow up and it was very,

it was very amusing. I want to do more of

that. I feel like one of my

original goals for the show

is I want I was like, this is going to be

a show about weird

subcultures and weird people that we

find on the internet and like, okay, with

the way the internet works

nowadays, it's hard to be like

so like cut and dry like a lot of weird

stuff on the internet is also

bleeding out into real life,

vice versa, whatever. But I want to focus

more on the weird stuff. I

want to focus more on the

fun stuff and not so much like, don't get

me wrong. It's important

when we talk about like,

all this like AI tech industry, ghoulish

takeover bullshit. I think

that matters as well. But like

one of the one of the other big points

that I was thinking about for

the last couple episodes is,

I feel like I feel like we've just been

on a big fucking bummer arc.

I feel like every episode is

talking about some new meticulously

detailed way in which the world sucks.

And like, I don't always

have an answer. I don't feel like I feel

like if I talk about how the

world sucks, I'd like to give

people a little bit more of something to

work with other than just

like, here's the new thing

feeding into my anxiety this week, which

I don't think is like the

point of the show. And like,

yeah, I think we want we want to be fun.

We want to be less. I think

I think the term that I used

in our private convo off air was

something like, I would rather we be the

smart person's idea of a

dumb show rather than a dumb person's

idea of a smart show, if that makes

sense. Absolutely. No,

no, for sure. And yeah, like, I always

think like, would I want

to listen to this? And yeah,

and I think like, we were we were on a

little bit of a bummer arc.

And yeah, it was partially about

like, you know, trying to trying to

figure out what's what's

going on here. And I think another

point is like, like, we've always been

like anti slop on this podcast,

obviously, I would dare to say

it's like one of the pillars of the show.

It's one of the main things

we're exactly exactly. And

ironically, in the pursuit of being not

slop, we we kind of like

became in a in a slop in a sense,

of just, yeah, like, like, not not really

not really having not

really having having a good time

here. And it's in it's obvious, like a

bleeds out. And I was

actually driving back from some some

type of function in my car. And I decided

to throw on like an old

episode. And and I was in I kind of

felt like, you know, we were having we

were having more fun back then it was

more it was more genuine.

It was more. It was it was it was a

little bit nicer. Like, I mean, yeah,

this is a this is one

of the big things, right? I think I think

it's hard for me to say,

like, have we started like

falling into the slop trap ourselves? And

like, by some definition, I

don't know, when I think of

YouTube slop, right, I think of something

that like, nobody really

wants to listen to that badly,

they just kind of put it on. And like,

they can't really imagine going through

the day without that

background noise or whatever. So it's

like something somebody

doesn't really want to listen

to all that much. And I don't know, like,

friends of mine who listen

to the show, like, they always

tell me, Oh, no, it's still good. I still

listen every week. I still

think it's funny, blah, blah,

whatever. But you know, of course, like,

my friends are gonna say

nice things. Sure, sure.

But when I think about, okay, is this

fun? Like, am I having a good time? I

feel like for the last

two or three months, I feel like there

have been a lot of times

where we've sat down to record an

episode. And like, I've really had to

kind of I've had to kind of

drag my feet. I'm like, Oh,

this is a thing I have to do because we

have to put out an episode

every week. It's not like, Oh,

I'm really excited to talk about this

topic. I can't wait to

record tonight. It's like, Oh,

we had to think of a topic of the last

moment. So I'm just gonna riff for an

hour about how much I

think the tech industry is full of

ghouls, which it is. And like, we've

talked about that before. But

like, I don't know. Sometimes if I'm

honest with myself, the last couple

episodes, I just haven't

really been having fun. And I don't know,

we don't really get a whole lot of

comments. But I do think

it's kind of shown in hindsight. I think

people can tell when when

our heart isn't like completely

100% in it. Yeah, for sure. And we're

still at the point where

like, this isn't a job. And if it

becomes a job, we're not even getting

paid. We're not even really getting paid.

It's fucking stupid.

I mean, that's that's that's the big trap

of like internet content

creation, right? It's like,

oh, it ropes people in because you're

like, Oh, I can I can set my own

schedule. I can just make

stuff I want I can just like do do

whatever. And like, no, you kind of have

to be your own shitty

boss if you want to succeed on a lot of

these platforms. Yeah,

yeah. And I think another thing

too is like, there have definitely been

discussions between the two of us where

it was kind of like,

Oh, well, what what would like, you know,

what would like sell like what what?

We're not that cynical about it, to be

clear, but it's kind of just like,

we've talked about like, strategies like

how do we go from a

YouTube show that like 100 people

listen to to like a show that I don't

know, like 500 people listen to and I

don't know, we're kind

of scratching our heads. I haven't quite

figured out that that

problem yet. And I and I think this

is part of the issue where we kind of

oscillated between like,

Oh, we should try to like get

guests who have like a following. And

then it's just like, oh,

that would that was like,

and I don't really want to talk to these

people. I got the hater arc and like,

I gotta be honest with you guys, I I'm

not going to name names

people who know they they know I

reached out to like one big guest who I

thought would be like

totally cool or whatever. And they

ghosted me and like for weeks I had a

fucking whiny pathetic

little crash out. I was like,

are we not good enough? Are we not funny

enough? Oh, what did I do

wrong? And I don't know,

it doesn't matter. Like fuck guests who

cares? But like, oh, I don't

think I'm cut out for seeking

out guests on the regular. And I mean,

like I was open to the idea,

but then the more I thought

about it's like, I don't really want to

talk to this person. Like

I don't know them. I don't

I don't like, I don't really give a shit.

And then yeah, and in

like the other thing is like,

there have been a lot of times where

like, you know, like we do these like

Reddit apps. And it's

in the thing is like, Oh, well, we

shouldn't do too many of

these because like, you know,

you don't want to be too like, just like,

kind of like lowbrow fucking

react shit. But the thing is

like, a lot of the times we do these with

the intention that it's

going to be just some like

dumb fucking slop episode. And then we

end up like having a

really good discussion. It gets

fucking super big brain and we're like

bringing up all these really

good points and shit like that.

That's the power of autism right there.

We can't be normal about it.

That is it. And I mean, there's been, you

know, if you're not on

the Patreon and if you're

thinking about it, you know, toss us a

sinister six dollars and

join the field with a brave

because like there's been so many bonus

episodes as well where we're just like,

like, like, this is just gonna be fucking

bullshit, like whatever.

And then it ends up like

being like really fucking really like a

really good kind of

somewhat. I'm not going to use the

word intelligent because because we can't

we can't we can't go that

far. But but it's been it's been

good. It's intellect coded. Yeah, for

sure. But as a quick aside and

related to something you said

before is like, yeah, we we get a lot of

support from our friends

and and and our small little

community of very, very lovely people.

But, you know, you guys should be

empowered to fucking to

shit on this show as we're doing right

now. I mean, you don't

need to be a fucking asshole

about it. But also, like, if you see it

going in a direction that

you that you don't like,

you know, you got to hold us accountable.

Yeah, look, I don't want

to come off like a like, oh,

I'm cynically asking you guys to like and

comment more often or

whatever. Like, oh, I guess any

engagement is good engagement or

whatever. I know, like the audience of

the show is kind of like a

mixed bag between like just like friends

of Dave and and I and also

like at least a few dozen

people who just stumbled on us through

like a few of the YouTube episodes that

popped up or whatever.

And like, I do want to encourage you guys

to comment more not even

in like a cynical like,

oh, this will help us in the algorithm

sort of way. But in a like,

I don't know what to improve

if you guys don't like voice your opinion

more often. Like I would

like the show to be good.

Like first and foremost, for people who

already like it, like,

don't get me wrong, getting more

of an audience would be nice. But like,

if you just like found us if

you've never talked to Dave

and I like personally in your life, and

you just like watch this

show on the regular, like,

please say something, please tell us

what's good and what's not. I

can't read minds. I'm not good

at the social media thing. I am not cut

out for for advertising or

whatever. If anything, like if

it were up to me, there would be a there

would be some kind of

like, government mandated like

rounding up of people who work in

advertising for whatever reasons. So I'm

not cut out for that

life. So like, just tell me what you like

about the show and what

you want more or less of and

like maybe in nice words. I don't know.

It's just a thought. Yeah,

no, for sure. And in people seem

more I think they feel more galvanized in

like being able to voice

criticisms. The bigger,

you know, like a creator is. And I've

definitely seen that before is like I

found like, you know,

some YouTube video or something with like

not a lot of comments or not

a lot of views or whatever.

And I wanted to say something, but it's

just like, I feel a little bit too

exposed then. I'm not like

just a person commenting in a sea of, you

know, standard comments

from their giant audience of

typical YouTube. Yeah. And also it's

like, oh, the episode was

uploaded more than an hour ago.

They're all already 300 comments. Like

who is even going to see my exactly

exactly. Yeah. But I mean,

you, you, y'all are in the position where

you can, where you can

make a comment and, you know,

see it or if you, yeah, for better or

worse, if you guys leave a comment, we

are going to read it.

So yeah, absolutely. And if you really

want to remain anonymous,

you can email us at Dave or

Briar at super despair world.com. Yeah.

Yeah. That would, that

would be nice. Anyway, let's,

let's talk about what are some, some

other things that we

could be doing better here.

Well, so, so the thing is too, I think

we, we need to prioritize us

having a, having a good old

fucking time because it is so easy to get

into this trap of like,

once you get a little bit of

traction, you start to think like, Oh,

what should we be

doing? And like a lot of the,

a lot of the stuff I've seen on, you

know, on the internet, especially, I

mean, the, the spirit of

this. And I know, I know everything is,

has just been kind of like

co-opted by, I mean, like,

if you're looking at like the original

YouTube or whatever, a lot

of this was just like people,

you know, making fun little videos and

like, or talking about

something that they care about.

And they were just doing that for the

fucking love of the game. And I have a,

I have a good example of that. Do you

know that? Do you know the Smosh guys?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They, they made

like a big fucking like

YouTube empire or something. And I

think they got bought out eventually. I

think they eventually made a lot of slop

content. I don't know

what they're up to now. I think one of

them is still like a big

YouTube or something, but

I remember being a kid watching their

early videos where it was

just like two, two like dipshit

teenagers, like doing a lip syncing video

to the fucking Mortal

Kombat song in like one 40 P on,

on YouTube back then. I'm like, actually

that video might predate

YouTube. I don't even remember. But

point is, um, I don't know. I think one

of the lessons we've

learned is we need to be doing

things for love of the game and not

focusing on like, well, let's

adjust our strategy to, to get

some more viewers here or let's do this

episode and then this

episode. And then this'll, this'll

do well because we use this keyword or

whatever. I think, I think we need to

stop kidding ourselves

that this is like a viable thing that we

can like game in any

meaningful way, because every time

we've tried it, it hasn't fucking worked.

So rather than like, you know, really

dragging our feet and

trying to, trying to make something,

trying to, to, to squeeze, uh, gold out

of the rock or whatever

the, the fucking saying is, I think we

just need to go back to, to

talking about whatever we think

is like funny or amusing or interesting

that week and, and just

not give a shit. I think, uh,

we need to stop kidding ourselves that,

oh, we're some kind of like current

events, some kind of

political news, whatever show. Cause

like, let's be real, Dave

and I fucking hate doing, doing

research. This is not like a pre-written,

pre-scripted like video

essayist on the, on the

side kind of, kind of program. If you

know what I mean. Well, yeah, yeah. And

like, I don't, I don't

mind doing a bit of research, but it's

gotta be something that I give a fuck

about. And I certainly

don't want to do research about fucking

current events politics.

Like, no, fuck that. Um, I also

don't want to do anything about like the

secret Marxism of space jam

or whatever. Oh yeah, exactly.

Like I, I, uh, I went to college. I, uh,

I finished grad school.

Uh, I'm done writing fucking

bullshit, like articles about things I

don't give a fuck about and pretending

to, you know, like be,

be a big brain about it. I'm, I'm good on

all that. Um, I, I will

like look into, I, I research

shit all the time just for my own, like

for my own curiosity. And,

uh, I just have, I just have

the correct opinion the first time

without doing anything. Yeah. Well, well,

I mean the, the, the

correct opinion starts, uh, starts first.

And then I do research to,

to, to confirm my opinion,

which is always right. So it's just, I'm

just nodding the entire

time. Like, yep. Yep. Yeah.

Right. Right. Of course. Can't be wrong.

Can't be wrong. But I

mean, like ironically,

or I guess not that ironically, the ones

that we haven't tried, uh,

to let, you know, do a fucking

keyword or whatever. Um, those are the

ones that got, you know, got

a bunch of like views and a

bunch of like random new people started,

started, uh, listening to

the show or whatever. And, uh,

yeah. So, so, I mean, at the very least

we're going to be having

a much better time than,

you know, trying to like, I don't know,

fucking think about like

thumbnails and shit. Like fuck

all that. Yeah. I know we, we had this,

the cynical ploy once

where we did like an episode

about Mr. Beast or something. And we were

like, what if we tried to

do like a Mr. Beast style

thumbnail for this episode and see if it

worked and, uh, it didn't,

it didn't do anything at all.

But, but I did have fun. I did have fun

making that thumbnail. So

it wasn't a complete loss.

It was more of a, more of a, a fun nail,

if you will. Right. Right.

And so that's the other thing

is, um, we started making these little

animatics, um, these little animated

shorts, uh, with some

clips from, from some episodes, uh, that

we thought were good, which

by the way, if you ever come

across a, uh, a clip from an old or new

or whatever episode that you think, uh,

that you think was a

real knee slap or, or you think would be

fun to see animated

doesn't even need to be the, the,

the greatest thing you've ever seen. Um,

please let us know. Cause we're, we're

always open to that.

But it doesn't, it doesn't matter if the

episode is from like a year

ago, just leave a comment.

I swear we're going to see it. Yeah,

exactly. Exactly. But, but

that's the thing too, is like,

you know, part of the onus for doing that

is like, um, you know, a

lot, a lot of people just love

endlessly scrolling through shorts on, on

whatever platform. And, um,

and so we thought like that

might be a good way to kind of promote

the show, get some more eyes

on it. Uh, years, I guess this

is a podcast after all, like have to have

to remember that, uh,

like, like I'm, I'm enjoying

doing that. I'm, uh, I'm, I'm learning

how to, uh, draw poorly.

We're even doing a little,

a little bit of a frame by frame

animation. We're having a great time.

Yeah. Every, every week for

the, the past like two months or so I've

been telling Dave, this is

the week I'm finally going

to shell out 20 bucks for procreate

dreams, the, the animation software. And,

uh, you know, I think

this week it's really going to happen.

You know, we've kinda, we've

kinda been dragging our feet

and by we, I mean, I with, with the $20,

but I feel really good

about this week. I think I'm

actually gonna, I'm actually gonna buy, I

think it's gonna really happen. Yeah.

It's a, it's a cool,

it's a cool little program. Um, anyone

with, with an iOS device you

can draw on, um, I, I recommend

it. It's a, it's, it's good shit. Yeah.

For me, you know, I've, I've

had a lot of fun with that,

with the shorts we've, we've put out so

far and the one that we're

working on at the moment.

And I will admit, you know, when we first

started the whole like

YouTube shorts thing,

I was kind of on the fence because, you

know, like, I feel like, okay, I've

talked endlessly about how

I fucking hate short form content, how I

think it like, it rots

people's brains or whatever,

but at the same time, I'm, I feel like, I

don't know, I think it's a

bit too cynical to say that

all short form content in some ways, like

lays like inherently bad. Cause it's not,

I think a lot of it is actually like

pretty, pretty high effort and pretty

well made or whatever.

I just don't really like the way that

it's like fed to people and encourages

them to stay on these

fucking apps for like hours upon hours at

a time without taking a

break or whatever. Yeah.

Without question. It's the same, it's the

same opinion I have on,

um, on podcasts and streaming

and shit like that, where it's, uh,

there's nothing inherently wrong with the

medium. It's just what it

tends to, uh, tends to express tends to

be shit, um, because it's

lower effort. So that's, that's

really all it comes down to. Yeah. Good

example of this, by the way,

one of the very first episodes

we did, we talked about Vtubers on the

internet and don't get me

wrong. I think it was, I think

it was a fine episode. It was a little

rough cause it was like one

of the, the very first ones or

whatever, but like looking back, like,

holy shit, we were, I feel like we were a

little too generous.

I feel like, I don't know. I feel like my

opinion of tubing has kind

of tanked a lot since then.

And like you said, I don't think there's

anything like

intrinsically wrong with like having a

cartoon character animated instead of a

face cam, whatever. I even

think there's something's good

about it, but like, wow, that's a lot of

pedophiles, dude. That's, that's a,

that's a fucking metric

ton of pedophiles, even by Twitch

standards. And it's, it's

one of those things where like

the shit rises to the top. Um, where like

I, there are like, I,

I've, I've seen Vtubers before

who were like doing something like really

creative with their avatar and the

technology and stuff.

Some people are fucking gods with OBS. It

kind of blows my mind. And

it's really neat and it's,

and it's cool. And it's like, and it, uh,

provides a way for

people to have like, uh,

you know, like a, a way to connect with

people a little bit more, um,

who maybe don't want to show

their face or, you know, maybe they have

a reason that, that they can't do that

or, or, or whatever.

Or they just want to play a character or

something and it's cheaper

than buying like a real costume

and getting dressed. I don't know.

There's, there's lots of reasons. For

sure. For sure. For sure. Um,

but like what rises to the top. It's some

Kawaii, uh, fucking anime

avatar that looks like it's

eight years old and, uh, just going, and

then like saying, and then mixing in,

yeah, some racial slurs.

And then like they're, they're just like

mouth breathing HIKIKO

MORI of shut in audience of,

of like people who should definitely all

be put on a watch list

or just like, wow. Uh,

Niko Chan is so Kawaii and Sugoi. And

it's like, oh man.

Okay. All right. Yeah. Yeah.

But to, to get things back on track a

little bit, I was talking

about how, um, you know,

previously, you know, I've said a lot of

very mean things about short form

content, but I don't think

it's like intrinsically bad or something.

And if I'm honest, you

know, when we first started,

we made the decision like, Hey, let's

start doing YouTube

shorts or whatever. It was,

it was on both of our minds. Like, well,

maybe that's just the

only way to actually get your

videos. Like any traction on YouTube,

maybe you just have to do

it or something like that.

And like, okay, maybe, maybe we started

for that reason. But I

think since then I've kind of,

I've kind of mellowed out a little bit

ever since we've had all

these condos, but like,

are we, are we handling the show in the

best possible way? And

I think going forward,

I'm not going to stress about it. I need

to, I need to have fun. I

think the priority of the,

of the YouTube shorts, the little

animatics, and we're posting them on, on

TikTok and all the other

places as well. I need to start posting

them on my blue sky because people

actually like follow me

there for some crazy reason. The thing is

it needs to be fun. We need

to get back to doing this for

love of the game. And I think my new

standard that I'm going to try to hold

myself towards is like,

every time I'm working on something for

the show, I need to like

ask like, am I having fun?

Like, is this the thing that I want to be

doing? Like I want to, I

want to be like working on

something creative. I want to be making

something every day. And if I

feel like, well, this really

sucks, but I need to do this before I can

go back to something else

that's fun, then, then I think

it's time to reevaluate. I need to, I

need to discover having fun with the

show, with the topics

we cover, with the, with the work that it

demands and, and just, and

just like not worry about,

about engagement anymore. I think, I

think that's the only way that

will, that will rekindle the,

the vibe that I feel like was lost a

while ago. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.

And, and we've talked

about this before. And I, I always think

about this as like, you

know, like this is, this is,

despite maybe the content not always

being that great as far as

the, as far as the podcast itself,

like this is, it's a, it's a pretty high

effort production,

considering like our size and, you

know, relative lack of resources. There's

zero, there's zero need in

the world for a podcast to

have like one fully drawn and rendered

illustration every single episode. But

that, that's the thing

I've been trying to do. Yes, yes. And so

I think about that and like,

from your perspective, it's

just like, man, that's like a lot of

work. Like Briar does a, does a, doesn't

like a solid illustration

for every episode. And it's like, well,

what's a worst case

scenario? You do, you do like a few

fucking really good drawings every week.

I, I have slowly and methodically

developed like a really

good workflow for editing, you know,

like, like motion graphics

and, and audio and shit like that,

which I, which I am, I'm interested in

getting better at. So like, I'm

genuinely, I'm genuinely

really proud of the little, the little

like TV screen we've got

off on the side, just playing

some bullshit, like little like

background video every episode. I don't

know how many people

appreciate that, but I think it looks

really cool. I think it's a lot of fun.

Yeah, no, it's, it's,

it's great. That's something we were

kicking around for a

while. And yeah, I, I like the,

I like the current format of that. And

you know, if, if, if the

show ever, you know, like,

got, got bigger, we could do even higher

production quality type of shit. It's

just hard to justify

right now. I think we're doing enough,

but you know, like, if I

didn't have to do me personally,

if I didn't have to do anything else to

like, to like, support my

lifestyle, you know, I would,

I would go fucking insane mode on, and on

all the motion graphics

and, and even the editing,

which I, I still do a decent job on, I

think. Yeah. And you know,

it might be a different case

for me. I don't really like to get into

my, my financials too deeply,

but like, I don't have like,

like a steady full time, a regular income

stream or whatever. But you

know, other than the show,

you know, I still have my hobbies, I

still have my other creative projects or

whatever. So it's not

like this is necessarily a secondary

thing, but like, I have other things to

like, devote my time

towards. It might be a different case if

I had like, unlimited

time in the world and like,

super disbarrelled was like, the only

thing I had, I had going

period. But, but that's different,

you know, at times, you know, I do get a

little bummed out because

I'm like, Oh, well, I would

love to do another run of stickers, I

would love to make some some cool merch

and t shirts and all

these other things. But like, we don't we

aren't really at that size

yet. And like, I don't know,

that's that's that's a bit of a bummer.

But like, there's not a whole lot that

can be done about it.

I think, in some ways, I feel like, in a

way, we've kind of, or at

least I'll speak for myself,

I'm not I'm not gonna put this on you. In

some ways, I feel like

I've kind of become a lot of

the things that I that I criticize a lot

in, in other media and in

and in like other other like,

creative people on the internet, you

know, it's a whole like, oh, wanting to

wanting to succeed or

feeling like you're you're entitled to a

broad audience of people,

you know, I think I stand by

everything I say, when I point out like,

okay, some person who hosts a big

podcast, this person is only

known for like, writing fucking tweets on

Twitter, okay, I don't think

they should be famous. I don't

think people should like, take them

seriously or whatever. But it's like,

well, does that mean I

deserve like a big audience? Like, I

don't know. Like, I'm I have like, one K

followers, something

like that on blue sky for like my art,

which I haven't even posted

that much of. So like, do I

deserve an audience? Not necessarily. I

don't know. I feel like, when

it comes to the whole like, oh,

influencer bullshit, I kind of feel like

very, very few people deserve

an audience at all. I think I

think you kind of need to be on some

level, at least a little bit full of

yourself to feel like,

yes, I'm going to record myself giving

opinions on the internet and people

should listen to them and

adopt my opinions or whatever. I feel

like I don't know, people

are very, are very like,

flippant and frivolous about this stuff.

I'm like, well, what makes you so

important? But at the end

of the day, it's like, well, I don't know

what makes me what makes

me so important. And I think

going ahead, I feel like I just wanted to

I just want to start having

fun with this again, I want

to start putting out good work. And I

want to feel like my work

can speak for itself. I don't

want to be be plagued by these feelings

of like, I tried so hard, I

did my best. Why isn't why

isn't the number going up? Why aren't I?

Why aren't I getting

more attention for this? Why

aren't people like reaching out to us

more, blah, blah, blah,

whatever? I don't I don't have any

control over those things. I can just the

only thing I can really

control is like, am I having

fun making the thing that I'm making? And

if not, then something

needs to change. And if I am,

then you want to fuck it. That's that's

how we roll. And maybe

it'll pay off someday. And maybe

it won't. And I feel like for everybody

who has made it, I think

that's that's kind of the key to

it. I feel like it's one of those things

where like, there's nothing less cool

than trying to be cool.

You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. And

like, so it's very tough to

navigate on a bunch of avenues.

Related to what you just said is like,

yeah, like it feels we

are kind of in the like,

cultural and generational milieu, where

it like, it feels kind of cringe to like,

try and put yourself

out there. Strangely, like the people who

are like the least

talented, and, you know, the most

mediocre, but they just have the fucking

courage just be like, yeah, I

should be I should be famous.

I should, I should be doing this. I

should be a musician. I should like,

whatever. They a lot of

the times they end up doing it just

because they have the fucking their

because their balls are

swinging, their balls are swinging low.

And they just keep on fucking doing it

without giving a shit.

But also, like, when it comes to like the

in and I think this hits everybody and

I've even seen like,

really big YouTubers and shit kind of

like, you know, like talk about this

before. And it's this

thing of like, just the it's hard to

know, like, is it the algorithm? Am I

just like, not getting

shown to people? Or is it because people

don't want to, like, they

don't like what I'm doing? And

it's really hard to say, because we don't

really know how this shit

works. Like, I mean, a lot of

the stuff that's like, quote unquote,

gone viral in the past,

especially in the early days of these

platforms, we don't like, it might have

just been some anomaly where

it just got shown to a million

people. And a lot of people are just

like, if they give a chuckle at

something, they'll fucking

like and subscribe to it. I mean, in a

lot of ways, it feels extremely

arbitrary. Because I remember

there was one episode we did, I think it

was the the in cells and red

pills one, where it's like,

oh, that one did pretty well. It got like

a few hundred views or

something. And that was part one.

And then later we put out part two, which

you would think, oh,

like, oh, in the algorithm,

well, it's the same title. It's the same

keywords, blah, blah, blah.

And part two did not do as well.

So I'm like, well, fuck me. I guess I

guess we thought that we

clued into something that does

well on YouTube. And it turns out it

doesn't. So I don't know.

Maybe maybe it's just random in

like I've seen a lot of this shit,

especially on the super

despair world YouTube account,

because neither of us really use it. So

it's always just showing

us like weird, like fresh

shit, not necessarily the front page, but

like, I don't I don't

really know how it how it like

thinks that things that we might want to

see. But a lot of it, for

probably obvious reasons,

is like people whose entire content is

like how to blow up

on YouTube or whatever.

And I've watched some of

this shit before and it's like

in and it's not just them like I've even

seen, you know, larger

YouTubers who I actually

respect and I think their content is

good, a comment on these

kind of things. And a lot of

this is like it's it's it's almost like a

weird, like religious, like, like

superstition about the

algorithm. Like people say things like,

oh, if you put a thumbnail

where your mouth is open and

you're putting there's text on it, it

gets shown to more people. If you don't

swear it within five

minutes of the video, it's better for the

algorithm, blah,

blah, blah, all this shit,

none of it has ever been proven or

confirmed by like all of these platforms

keep their algorithm

very secret for obvious reasons because

they don't want people

gaming it. So like it's all

just like it's all just like just weird

tales and superstitions about

like what what works and what

doesn't and how to make your video go

viral. And most of it is fucking

bullshit. Yeah, there's

there's actually a really good video

essay I saw about this at one

point. It was it was from the

very big video essay boy, super eye patch

wolf. The video is called

influencer courses are garbage

the dark side of content creation. It's

like it's like a two hour

video where you know he has a

pretty big YouTube channel. I don't have

the exact subscriber count.

Oh, he's got like 1.8 million

subs or whatever. He's been at it for

like many, many years now. And

he's like, okay, I have a big

channel. Let's see like what all these

like how to how to blow up

your channel courses or about or

whatever. And like, you know, you can

watch the the two hour essay yourself,

I'll just get to the

point. It's all like fucking scams and

shit. There are a lot of things that like

might have worked at

some point, but either like, well, it was

like a specific time and

place and this doesn't work

anymore. Yeah, or like there's a

different moment in internet culture. And

this thing was really

popular, but now it's not. Or like, one

of the examples I brought up

on this show before was the

whole like PewDiePie thing, where like he

was initially big on

like the Swedish algorithm,

and then he just like moved abroad to the

US. And then because his

computer was in a new place,

now his like big channel was like popping

off like fresh for the

first time ever in the in the US

algorithm. It's like, okay, people can't

fucking do that anymore, like

intentionally or otherwise.

And like, yeah, it's just a big bummer.

Like he looks over some things in the

video about how like,

oh, I found this very small channel of

somebody who's been like doing doing

really well and making

good stuff for years. And like it just

hasn't, hasn't been found

by anybody. And like, I don't

know, I think the only rational

explanation that there is, if you don't

want to, if you don't want

to drive yourself fucking insane, like we

have lately, is that all

this stuff is just random,

it's just come down, it just comes down

to luck. And like maybe

eventually we'll, we'll roll those

dice and get a nat 20 or some shit. Or

maybe we won't maybe it

just doesn't happen. Maybe it's

just too many fucking people rolling dice

at the moment. So I don't

know whether the show succeeds

or not, I think the priority needs to be

we need to go back to just

having like fun, weird, absurd

bullshit. I want to have fun with the

show again. I don't want to feel like

there are topics we need

to cover or like news we need to talk

about, or like things we

need to do and not do to like,

like do well as a podcast because like, I

don't even know what that

means. I look at all the

podcasts that do well, and I don't want

to do the stuff they're

doing. So it doesn't matter.

Yeah, exactly. And yeah, like that's,

that's the thing too. And

going off what you were talking

about before, I remember there was, there

was some like, you know,

you, you know, masterclass

that fucking bullshit website that they

try to sell you. Like

it's like a video platform,

but they'd like hire, you know, famous

people to be like, how

would it be a composer by,

I don't know that specific one, but I'm

pretty sure I've seen

like two or three other ones

just like it in YouTube ads. I haven't

seen that being like

shilled lately. I don't know if

they're still around or if they ran out

of money or whatever. It can't be a

viable platform because

they're probably paying these people an

insane amount of money to

like, but like, so that they'll

have like, like Hans Zimmer tell you how

to be a composer. And

it's basically just like an

entertainment series. They're not

actually like really, it's just like, Oh,

be intentional about

the sounds you use. And it's like nothing

really actionable, but it

makes me think of those.

It makes me think of those absolutely

dogshita, how to draw anime

books that I would see at the

school book. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And

like, the reason I bring that up is

because there was one,

there was one with Ninja, the fucking dog

shit, like Fortnite

streamer or whatever. And it was,

it was that he was like, Oh yeah, you

want to be famous streamer

like me? Here are the steps to do

that. And it's like, Oh, but find a game

that's Epic and that people

are playing and play that.

And then like connect with your audience.

Hey, chat. Uh, is this, is

this poggers, uh, and, and do

fun, where do funny things? Like, for

example, I wore a silly hat

while I was, and it's like,

no, none of these are the reasons that

you're popular. It's

because you started streaming

in like 2007 on like Justin TV. And there

was like four other people

doing it. And, uh, you just kind

of grandfathered in an audience after a

while. Like, like, that's,

let's be fucking real about

that shit. And, and, uh, I mean, to the

extent that all this stuff

is arbitrary, I feel like,

you know, you take a lot of the people

who are like well known for being like,

Oh, this is like a big

fucking internet influencer nowadays.

Like if you, if you made them

start over from scratch with

nothing else going on, like they don't

know what it's fucking like

to be like a, a small fish, the

big ocean anymore, you know, they

wouldn't know what the fuck to do. Yeah.

And like, so another

thing, like from my life experiences,

like when I, when I was like towards the

tail end of finishing

my undergrad in college, I was, I was

playing a lot of music and I

was learning a lot and I was

practicing quite a bit. And, uh, I never

really like had any, you know, like

illusions about like

being a professional musician or

anything. It was just something that I

kind of wanted to do.

Um, and then eventually when I like moved

to Korea, I was still

doing that like quite a bit

on top of, you know, whatever other shit

that I was doing. And then

like, I, I kind of like had

opportunities where somebody was just

like, Hey, like, uh, they're looking for

like a guitarist to,

to do to, to play this gig or like

whatever. And I just happened to like,

have that skillset because

I was just doing it for the, for the

fucking love of the game.

And then, uh, you know, like an

opportunity presented itself and I was in

the right place at the

right time and, and it ended up

becoming something, something cool. So

like, that's kind of the mindset that I

think you have to have

if you're trying to do anything like this

is it can't be like, like

if you're, if you're starting

from ground zero and it's just like, I

want to become an animator

to be, so I could be famous

like this animator that I like and make a

cool show and like, and

make a lot of money and have

that be my career. You're, you're already

fucked. You're already

fucked. And like, if, if that's in

the back of your mind and that's like a

long term, like goal, hopefully that's

cool, but like it has

to be like doing the work for the love of

the game first and that

other shit can come later,

maybe. But if you're, if you're just

doing that with the, if

you're, you're on step 20, you're

thinking about step 20 and you haven't

even like opened the open

the page to step one yet. Um,

because like here's, here's the fucking

thing. Uh, there is a good

chance that it doesn't happen,

which is fine, which is fine. Um, it

doesn't happen for the vast

majority of people. Right.

And, and like the thing is about like

some sort of creative career,

whatever. Um, if, if all you

want is like a career with money, um, and

you're just like slogging

it out, doing something that

you think is kind of neat, but you don't

really want to do, there

are jobs that you can get that

are like maybe tangentially related to

that. And it's kind of a

slog, but you won't hate it,

but you'll have like a salary and shit

like that. Um, do that instead. Do that.

I would dare, I would dare to say that

even if you want a creative

job, there are like safer,

less, probably less fun things you could

do, uh, to, to increase your

odds if that's all you care

about. Right. Like I'm working in

tabletop RPGs or whatever.

I'm working on my own game,

which not announced yet, whatever, but

like I, I, it's like my own

thing. I can do whatever I want

with it. I don't have like a publisher I

answer to or whatever. And

like, yeah, that means I'm

going to make a whole fuck lot less

money. Um, you know, people who, who work

in, in my industry or

whatever, if they want the safe money,

uh, they're going to be

writing fucking like little, little

add-ons for fucking dungeons and dragons.

And they're going to be

teaching themselves to do,

to do the like popular like, uh, league

of legends, world of

Warcraft, D and D, uh, uh,

highly shiny rendered art style or

whatever. And like, don't get me wrong.

I'm sure like there's,

there's some like talent and, and, and,

and effort and like artistic merit that

goes into that stuff

as well. But like, I think D and D

fucking sucks. I don't care if it's the,

the thing that makes

like 90% of the money, if not more in the

industry, I don't want

to, I don't want to work

on that. And like, that's the, that's the

concession that I've made.

Uh, just like with this show,

you know, I look at all the podcasts that

have like, quote unquote

succeeded and make a lot of

money and, and, uh, do really well. And

like, I think they're shit.

I, I can't stand listening

to them. I don't like the personalities

involved in, in these shows.

I don't like the, the things

they do every week to like, uh, to, to

squeeze that income out of

a, out of a rock or whatever.

I don't know. I think it sucks. I feel

like, uh, on some level, if

you want to, if you want to like

make it as, as a creative person in any

way, you kind of, you have to

do your own thing. And I think,

uh, for better or worse, I don't know,

maybe, maybe worse. I feel

like you kind of have to,

you kind of have to accept that it's

probably not going to be like

your main source of income or

whatever. And like, I don't know, it is

what it is. Like a lot of

my, a lot of, uh, a lot of the

worst tendencies we've practiced in the

last couple, couple of

weeks or months or whatever.

Uh, I don't want to get into it too

deeply, but I do think a lot of it is

rooted in some of my own,

like insecurities about, uh, about my

financial situation in

real, in real life. And like,

that's not an excuse or anything, but I

think, uh, you know, those are my own

problems. I got to deal

with it. I don't need to like drag it in,

uh, into the show, like, like walking

into somebody's house

with like, with like mud on your shoes or

whatever. I think, uh, we

just got out, we just got to

rediscover the fun, have a, have a good

time on the show. And, uh, if

there is some like, uh, path

to success that we have any control over,

I feel like that's, that's

gotta be a key ingredient. I

feel like we gotta, we gotta stop forcing

it. And I think, yeah,

that's, I just think that's what

we've been doing a lot lately. Yeah. So

on that note, uh, subscribe to the

Patreon, uh, buy some

merch because we're, we're both

destitute. Uh, we live in separate

cardboard boxes and it's the

rainy season. So the balls are coming

down, baby. They're coming

down. Although I would appreciate

if people, if people bought the stickers

just to like put them up in some funny

places in real life.

I think that's, I think that's really

cool. I appreciate the few people who

have done that so far.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And they are nice

stickers. I will say not to,

I'm not trying to hard sell

anyone here, but yeah. And I want, and I

want a bigger audience so

that I can make more of my,

I've gotten better at drawing since we

made those. I want to make new stickers,

but I don't know. Uh,

it's expensive. So yeah, really, to be

honest, I don't give a fuck about the

money right now. Uh,

I would just like to have, um, a bigger

community because I think

that would be fun and it would,

uh, and it would, it would encourage us

to do more and cooler

in different things. Uh,

I would like at least three or four me,

four more people who are

in on the force fem joke to,

to yuck it up with in the discord. Yeah.

There, there you go. There

you go. We could do that. But,

um, yeah, I mean, um, if, if, uh, I

guess, I guess what I'll

end on is, um, thank y'all

who have been rocking with us this whole

time. Uh, yeah, I would

like to know what you think

about all the things we've pontificated

on in this episode. And, uh, you know,

if, if you like it and,

uh, and you think it's good, maybe, uh, I

don't know, tell your friends, tell your,

tell your grandma, tell your great

grandma. Um, they all have, they'll have

iPhones now, you know,

you know how to get on there. Yeah. I

think I've kinda, I've kinda exhausted

everything I meant to

bring up. I think going into this

episode, it was important

for me to like not come off

a little too apologetic or whatever. I

think it's also a very

easy trap for a lot of like

small creators on the internet to do this

thing where like, Oh

guys, I'm so sorry. I didn't,

I didn't put out a video today. Oh, I'm

sorry. I didn't post much art

this week, blah, blah, blah,

or whatever. And like, guys, don't do

this. Every time like I see

somebody I'm following on blue

sky with like 500 followers be like, I'm

sorry. I didn't put out

enough content this week, guys.

I'm still alive. I'll get back to making

things soon. I'm like,

buddy, relax. You don't need to

beat yourself up over, over like a three,

a three digit number. It's

no big deal. So I don't know.

To me, this is more like, I think we're,

we're kind of shifting

gears. I want to go back to

having fun with the show. I want to go

back to talking about

dumb, goofy bullshit. I kind of

want to go back to yucking it up over

things that, that don't matter. And I

know, I know that can be

really difficult because, uh, I don't

want to just like put my head in the sand

and completely ignore

everything going on in the world. We live

in some scary times. I

know it stresses out a lot of

people, but also like, I don't think the

world needs yet another

podcast that is, uh, building a

meticulously accurate, uh, 3d model of

all the exact ways in which the world

sucks. I think people

have a, a good idea of what's wrong. I

look at some of the

episodes, uh, we do. I'm like, yeah,

maybe in 2025, we don't really need to be

yet another, uh, hour

long YouTube video explaining

what is a tech bro. You know, I think

people get it by now. So

let's, let's go back to something

goofy. Let's stop kidding ourselves about

what the show is and isn't

and, uh, and have some fun

with it. And, uh, and, uh, especially,

uh, have some fun with, uh,

our, our, our patrons, the,

the few, the brave, the, the, the force

femmed. Yeah. Well, uh,

just to, just to go off that a

little bit is like, yeah, I think this

episode was, uh, more of a self

affirmation for what we're

doing going forward, uh, a roadmap, if

you will. And, uh, yeah, I don't

apologize for really

anything I've said about anyone, but

yeah, I don't, I don't

apologize to any other podcasts,

but I will apologize to our audience for

doing a lame episode that

we didn't need to record.

So yes, yes, exactly. Exactly. And, um,

yeah, yeah. If you want

to listen to some like

doomer, uh, political bullshit, there's

plenty of stuff on

YouTube that you could, uh,

that you could listen to. Um, but it

ain't going to be this one from now on.

And that's not to say

we're never going to like bring up any,

you know, like political things or

current events, but it's

not going to be, yeah, we're not going to

be dissecting like the

magga or anything like that.

Listen guys, there are, there are a

thousand, uh, untalented, uh, boring

trans women who will

pander to all the bullshit you want to

hear about current events

way harder than I will. So, uh,

go continue listening to them instead, I

guess. And, and, uh, I'm

sure they'll have a bunch of

parasocial dip shit, fucking weirdos who

will, uh, jump into the

comment section, uh, defending

them for like against any of the, uh, the

big old meanies out

there on the internet too. So

you don't get it Dave. She's,

she's so funny and talented.

Yeah. I'm, I'm just a, I'm just a big old

hater, I guess, but okay. Let's, let's,

isn't a hater. Let's wrap it up. We're,

we're, we're, we're, we're drawing, we're

getting cynical again.

You know, who isn't a hater is, uh, the,

the, the, the patrons,

the patrons. And, um,

these patrons are Nick, Breena, Weasel,

Heresy, Nilly, uh, Patty,

Clam, and Walker. And, uh,

thank you patrons for, uh, for being, for

being you. Thanks for being you.

Thanks guys. Never forget, uh, super

despair world is dead.

Long live super despair world.

Yes. Uh, well said. Uh,

yeah. Good fight. Good night.